I
haven’t read up on all of the “Game of Thrones” fan theories out there — it
might be the one Internet rabbit hole I haven’t fallen down. So I don’t know
what fans are positing as the endgame of the story, and please, don’t tell me.
Really, don’t tweet at me about the prediction you’re absolutely sure is going
to come true — I’d rather be surprised by what transpires as the series
launches into its home stretch. I’ve read the first three books in the “Song of
Ice and Fire” saga, but I’m glad that the show has gone past George R.R. Martin’s
tomes, because whether we’ve read the books or not, at this point, the entire
audience is getting surprised left and right.
At
least, it should be. The biggest problem with the spectacle of the “Battle of
the Bastards” is that it all more or less went the way I expected it to.
(Except Wun Wun died. RIP Wun Wun, you were done done too soon.)
A
lot of the predictability of the episode can be laid at the feet of Jon
Snow — who is handsome, brave, and not the sharpest sword in the weapons
locker. Let me be frank: Jon Snow should never rule anything, ever. If him
sitting atop the Iron Throne and ruling Westeros is a fan theory or any kind of
endgame scenario, may I submit my reaction to that: Nope.
Now,
I don’t despise Jon Snow as I may despise a certain orange-hued loudmouth on
the American political scene. I actually think he means well, and he has a good
heart. And yet, I have good reason to launch the hashtag #NeverSnow.
Of
course, I admired Miguel Sapochnik’s direction of the battle for Winterfell
(though one of my takeaways was, serving as a Ye Olden Knight’s horse was not
even a little bit fun. The Bastard’s Battle was a terrible day for horseflesh).
But I couldn’t truly enjoy it to its fullest extent. All that blood was shed
because Jon did exactly what Sansa warned him against — he fell into a trap set
by Ramsay. Yes, the action was exciting and terrifying and gave you a great
sense of what it was like to be inside a grinding, seemingly endless battle.
And
yet, throughout the whole thing, in my mind, I was yelling at Jon. The more
printable version of my rant goes something like this: “You nitwit, before the
battle, you told Ramsay that the two of you could settle this without
needlessly killing many men — but thanks to your rashness, that’s exactly what
transpired! You knew that it was likely that Rickon would die, and that the
awful Ramsay would bait you in some horrible, sadistic way. And yet you fell
for it. Why literally pile hundreds, if not thousands, of dead bodies on top of
Rickon’s corpse for no reason? If the plan was to let Ramsay’s army come to
you, let
Ramsay’s army come to you! Don’t diverge from the plan that would
save lives simply because he got to you and you’re angry!”
Sansa
warned Jon, who knew of Ramsay’s sick reputation anyway, and yet he made
the worst possible decisions regardless of all of that. The Ned Stark is strong
in this one. “Despite Sansa’s warnings that Ramsay wouldn’t play by the rules
of any game Jon might be familiar with, our noble bastard has the same
shortcomings as Ned Stark; he fights with honor against opponents who are all
too willing to use that predictable morality against him.” Yep.
The
predictability of Jon falling for the smirking Ramsay’s tricks marred the
episode; it doesn’t help that we knew why Jon reacted that way. His actions did
not seem necessary; they were selfish and resulted in the sacrifice of lives
that his forces could ill afford to lose. A leader needs to see the big picture
and act accordingly, and his failure to act in a cool, intelligent way in that
battle means he’s clearly not ready for the bigtime, leadership-wise. He’s not
ready to play a role on the national stage, that’s for sure.
I
hoped against hope that Jon had kept some men in reserve. Wouldn’t it have been
incredibly clever of him to appear to
fall for Ramsay’s trick, but then have a group of soldiers lying in wait for
the Bolton forces, ready to strike at a key moment?
It
was a bit of a letdown that Sansa swooped in and saved the day via
Littlefinger’s army, another move that went exactly as expected. None of us
believed that note she sent off on a raven was a memo to her dressmaker about
what frocks to whip up. Littlefinger’s forces arrived in the nick of time, but
there was nothing surprising and thus triumphant about that. (As my husband
dryly noted, “Here comes Gandalf and his army, right on time.”)
The fact
that it was so mechanically set up and so widely expected drained the moment of
much of its impact. This is also a narrative that pulls out the deus
ex machina a fair bit — Sansa saving the day this week is not
unlike Daenerys arriving in Meereen last week, with her dragons
ex machina, if you will.
Now
that we have so much investment in a number of the characters, to see them make
tough decisions, meet up with each other again and come together in new
combinations is fascinating at best and highly watchable in otherwise
variable episodes.
I
would give most of my gold to see Pod and Bronn star in a road-trip buddy comedy;
any time Brienne shares the screen with anyone (especially Jaime) it’s pure
gold; and if you have not sworn allegiance to the tiny but ferocious Lady
Mormont, what are you even doing with your life? Her resting angryface in
Sunday’s episode is classic Lady
Mormont:
It’s
very obvious by this point that the narrative has made a huge overall turn from
“Game of Thrones’” early seasons, and now the female characters and their
points of view are getting a lot more screen time. The women are basically over it.
They are often more fierce, more ruthless and more committed to their agendas
than the men, which reflects their experiences of being ground under the
bootmheels of various patriarchal cultures.
Yara
Greyjoy struck a canny deal with Dany. But what kind of leader will Yara
be when no one in her kingdom will be able to steal and reave anymore? It’s the
basis of their economy, after all. And is Dany necessarily a good potential
(and actual) ruler, given that her idea of governing consists of the sentence,
“I have dragons, your argument is invalid.”
I
hope that “Game of Thrones” doesn’t go the route of patronizing women by
positing them as the generally more intelligent and rational gender. Neither
gender has a monopoly on stupidity or wisdom. Perhaps the ultimate message is
that no one person holds the key to good governing — Dany only works as a ruler
with Tyrion by her side, Jon would have been better off taking Sansa more
seriously, Yara is a brave leader but she might do well to keep the newly
humbled Theon by her side, etc.
I
hope all the potential leaders of both genders remain flawed, complicated and
interestingly contradictory. Ramsay wasn’t a good character because he was
boringly, predictably smug and I’m glad he’s dead. The citizens of
Westeros should realize that the new king in the North, or the Stark/Snow in
the North, or the Bastard of Winterfell or whatever they’re going to call him,
should probably just stay inside that castle, listen to his sister, and more or
less leave it at that.
That
probably won’t happen, but I do know one thing: Jon Snow should not sit on the
Iron Throne. Westeros could use some fresh blood in Kings Landing: I’m all for
Lady Mormont taking the highest office in the land. The people of
Westeros could do worse.
Representative
Image
Source:
Variety
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